i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
