He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I checked into jail on foursquare
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
