Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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