Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
