The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Randomize
