he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
