I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
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