She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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