When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
