walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
this boner is exhausting
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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