Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
