Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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