Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
