All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
sick fucks of a feather flock together
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
