I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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