he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize