How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I know her cup size but not her name....
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
