i don't like sucking hair
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
It's just like the Real World with babies
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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