I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
