Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
