i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Randomize
