remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
