Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
