I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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