Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
