I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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