I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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