Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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