she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
