two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
