...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
He did a backflip because drugs
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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