Me. At least after what I've been through.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
