Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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