no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
