best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Pooping to opera.
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