so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
