Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
