just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize