You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
