It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
