i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
