it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
