He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
