they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
