Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
