I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
