I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
