I wish i was in the wii world.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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