If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
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