Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
